When inspiration hits at 1:28AM, what do you do? You get up, open the laptop, and write.
Been a while since I wrote, and I miss it so much! I have tons of work to do, but I'm trying to make time for my hobbies. This story is a whole lot of things. It's about love, games, lies, family, friendships, and finding yourself. Okay so rules have to be made, I'm extremely busy with university and studying. I tried writing as much of the story as I could, but I didn't exactly meet the deadline I set for myself, but I promised you guys to post the story on a certain date so I will post it. Also please give me feedback!
Enjoy!
❥
-
I woke up automatically at 6:30AM as if I wasn't on a vacation, and I tried as hard as I could to go back to sleep, but it didn't work. At 7:14 I was dressed and ready, even though I had no where to go. I opened the door to the apartment, and walked out of the building. After seeing that everyone awake was either on their way to work or school and some were out jogging, I decided to just go to the nearest starbucks. I went in, and the guy behind the counter 'Thu' smiled automatically at me, and I waved back. He started working on my usual order and I found a table to sit in. The only seat I found was one in a far corner in front of the window, so I took it. Sadly, I'm not exactly the most sociable person, I only have one close friend, her name is Lulu and she is the exact opposite of me. So, I don't have many people to talk to at this time of the day, or any time of the day anyway. Strangely enough, even though I was a bit of a social outcast in real life, I had a ton of friends on social media websites. I know it's not enough, but I have serious attachment issues, my only best friend is Abdullah, who is also my boyfriend. I started staring out the window, and I was lost in my 17th dream when I was engulfed with the smell of caramel and coffee.
I looked up and smiled to the sweetest waitress I have ever met, and asked her if she could sit down. Sadly, it was rush hour so she couldn't. I wrapped my hands around the steaming cup of deliciousness, and as if I wasn't weird enough I inhaled deeply the addictive smell of coffee and sweetness. Suddenly, someone who seemed to stand out from the crowd passed by the window. I don't know what was it exactly but something made my eyes follow him. I was brought back to the place I'm in by hearing my ringtone. It was 8:20 already! Wow, time does fly by when your mind drifts.
Mama Calling
I let out a sigh, she probably woke up and noticed that I went out.
Areen: hala?
Mom: mama Areen weenk!
Areen: sorry mama nseet agolk gbl a6l3, gmt bdri w nzlt atmsha..
Mom: aha, 6yb ana brj3 anam shwy, e4a rj3ti elshiga la t6l3en a9wat.
Areen: ok!
Mom: i love you.
Areen: me too..
I clicked off, and then my phone rung again. Can nobody get any peace or quiet anymore?
Abdullah Calling
Great, exactly what I needed. I want nothing more than to ignore this call, but I can't.
Areen: heyo!
Abdullah: hala bglby w ro7yyyyy
Oh wow, as if it couldn't get any better I get drunk Abdullah.
Areen: 3bdullah! 9a79e7 b3den t3al klmni! B3den elsa3h 2 elfjr 3ndkom bLA! Wsho twk raj3 elshiga?
Abdullah: ee.. babe!
I sighed.
Areen: hala..
Abdullah: tell me something that will make me go to bed happy...
I felt my whole body get covered in goosebumps from his tone. Lately, the Abdullah I fell in love with and made me feel like I was the only girl in the world, vanished. Now, there was only this disgusting piece of trash, with the lowest morals in the world, and the worst part is I can't find it in me to break up with him. I still have hope that the guy I fell in love with will come back.
Areen: get your sh*t together then come talk to me!
And I slammed the phone on the table, loudly. Everyone turned to look at me, and at that moment that guy that my eyes followed when he passed by the window went in. He looked at my funny and I blushed the darkest red. I quickly got up and slammed 5 pounds on the counter closest to Thu.
So as you all might have guessed, I'm in a relationship with a horrible terrible guy who studies in L.A. The sad part is, he wasn't like that when we first met. We actually first met, when I was 14 and he was 16, we were sitting on the steps leading to my apartment in London. My parents were only just divorced, and he somehow seemed to ease the pain. He was sweet, considering, funny, and everything I needed at that time. We started out as friends, and he even met my mother. Then we took to another level a year later. Now, here I am 21 years old, fresh out of university, thank god for summer courses! And that sweet perfect guy who I fell in love with, first started drinking, and lost his father and his best-friend in the same year, and then dropped out of university. It's been 2 years and he only keeps getting worse, whenever I try reasoning with him he keeps saying how he inherited millions, companies, and investments that he could live off for the rest of his life.
I'm pretty sure any sane person would've broken up with him after he became the lowest of lows, but I couldn't find it in me to do so. He was there for me when I was going through the toughest time I ever had, how can I not be there for him? Also, to be fair, when he isn't drunk he isn't bad.
Through all this thinking I didn't realise that I was standing in front of the door totally zoned out. I opened the door and sighed.
Mom: AREEN!
I took a deep breath, I love my mother, really, but she could be a bit too controlling at times.
Areen: smi?
Mom: wsh rayk t9b3'en sh3rk ash blonde? Aw bronde?
Did I mention that my mom worked in fashion too? So she was always into the newest trends, and I know she secretly wished that I was a girl who is interested in being extremely stylish. I know how to dress up, but I don't like to do it, a lot.
Areen: Mama! 3ajbni sh3ri the way it is!
Mom: bes, the blonde you have on now doesn't suit you anymore.
I know, but Abdullah likes it. I might wear a lot of stuff that he likes, don't ask me why, I'm very much a feminist but you know I want to look good for him.
Areen: let's discuss it later. So, esh swety ams?
Mom: shopping, coffee with those horrible ladies that I call friends, then more shopping, and then lunch with 5altk 3abeer, and- oh! Shftlk shoes, you'll love them.
Areen: walla?!
I got excited about shoes, that is probably the only thing I have in common with my mother. My excitement couldn't become more than this, but it doubled when I saw the gorgeous nude coloured winged Giuseppe Zanotti sandal heels.
Areen: oh mama, it's gorgeous!
I almost cried at how beautiful it is, I know they're shoes to some people but to me they were pieces of art.
Mom: want to know the best part?
Areen: what?!
Mom: I bought your size in all 4 colours!
Also another thing I share with my mom, the wasting of money.
Areen: MAMA! We said we will try to become more 'economic' and try to 'save money'.
Mom: el5eer el7mdellah wajd, so we don't have to save money! 9adgeni!
Areen: 'kay.
Mom: b.t.w-
Areen: not cool mama, mara not cool.
Mom: okkk, by the way, ubok yb3'ak tro7enla blriya9' as soon as we arrive in Jeddah.
Areen: walla?!
I was probably a bit more excited than my mother hoped I would be, but I missed my dad. Their divorce tired me out, especially since I was an only child, but the minute I decided to move with my mom to Jeddah I could feel and actually see my dad's heart break. He remarried soon after we moved and he had 2 daughters, they were twins, and the cutest ones to be honest. I was glad that my dad moved on with his life, but somehow I had a feeling that he was never really over my mom. Even though she was very over him, she always told me that she felt suffocated when she was with him. Their divorce might have been the hardest thing I ever went through but I know it was for the better.
Mom: you know that he loves you more than anything, and you picking me over him really broke his heart.
Areen: adri, bes you're my mother and I couldn't leave you alone.
I kissed the top of her head, and she suddenly stood up.
Mom: yalla! 5n6l3!
Areen: ok let me just grab my bag!
Mom: ki4a btlbsen?
I looked down at what I was wearing, what was wrong with it? I had light washed off ripped jeans paired with a button down worn out black shirt I got from Abdullah, and the most beautiful but also painful Valentino studded black heels.
Areen: the shoes are pretty!
Mom: true..
Areen: yallaa let's go!
Mom: at least wear the bag I bought you yesterday, pleaseee!
Areen: no, it's way over the top mama.
We walked out of the apartment and my mother was still begging me to wear a fancier bag, and clothes that didn't make me look homeless and I was absent-mindedly nodding my head to her rant while I was typing a very angry text to Abdullah. When suddenly I ran face first into someone who was walking in front of me. I should never text and walk.
Areen: ouch.
?: sorry, ma shftch.
I looked up, and up, and up, and up, and until I couldn't crane my neck anymore to see that guy from the coffee shop. How did he know that I am Khaleeji?! And how on earth is he so tall?! He looked normal while I was sitting.
xo
Sunday, November 1, 2015
Thursday, June 25, 2015
2:48
"It's 2:48AM and I'm starting to miss you all over again.."
I read the sentence over and over again. Ironically it is 2:48AM, and I miss him more than words can say. I looked up at my nonexistent baby bump and felt the tears clouding my vision. How can I miss someone who left me when I needed him more than anyone else? How can I miss someone who lied to me and left me stranded? How can I miss a guy who got me knocked up without marriage? How can I miss a guy who promised me love, marriage and a life full of happiness but instead ruined my life?
No matter what I do, and no matter what happens my life cannot get worse. I tossed and turned in bed, but it was all useless. I couldn't sleep even if my life depended on it. Tomorrow is a big day and I need as much rest as I can get. I told my parents that I was travelling with my friends, and I am but not for a vacation. I'm going to Egypt to get an abortion. I'm not as good of a girl as everyone thinks. You see it all started when I wanted to rebel against my parents, a couple of years ago. When we all looked much younger than we are.
Flashback:
Flashback:
Akrah omi w oboy w akrah keef y3amloni! Akrah kef y7son el7yat bes 3nhom w 3n mshaklhom els5efa!
Nora: Maryam, you will regret this.
I exhaled loudly, while putting on my lipstick. When will my friend get that I don't have the perfect little family she has?!
Maryam: Nora, 7bebti esm3eni ana ma 3endi ahal yrboni, fahma? Ana 3ndi om sh3'lt'ha 3zaym w sfr m3 9degat w akbr hmomha swara Van Cleef w slsal Cartier w sa3h Rolex. Alzm ma 3leha elwald y36eha flos, w m36ya bagi 7yat'ha 9'hrha.. W oboy? Allaah ha4a salfa thanya! Mstans m3 zojta elthanya w mskt omi blflos wl7oreya eli m36eha iyaha! W a5wani kln lahi b7yata m3 azwaja w 3yala, walla lw a6l3 mn elbet shahr w arj3 ma7d dra 3ni.
Nora: bla hbl 3ndk ana, w aked yhtmon fek.
Maryam: ee omy tdg 3la elsh3'ala tet2akad eny 3aysha.
Nora: 6yb y3ny bt6l3en m3 ha4a wsh esma? Ahh ee Fawaz!
Maryam: ee b6l3 m3ah, mo 3nad knt a3and al7in 7beta.
Nora: 7beteh mnjd?
Maryam: ee! 7beta. W hwa m36eni el7nan wl ehtemam eli m7d mn ahali m36eni eyah.
Nora: walla ana mo mrta7a lh, abdn.
Maryam: 3omrk ma ert7ti elshy enti a9ln!
Nora: Maryam 3shani la t6l3en m3ah e7sasi ygoli ena ha4e mo fat7at 5eer!
Maryam: yarbeh mnk! Bye ana b6l3 w enti 5lek 3la glbk eli y36ek e7sask.
Nora: take care, don't let him take advantage of you.
Nora: take care, don't let him take advantage of you.
Back to reality.
If only I had listened to her at the time, if only. Then things would've been a whole lot different, but what's meant to be will be. So no use in regretting now, the deed is done. My god I was so stupid to give up as easy as that to him. To think that I trusted him!
Flashback:
Nora: Maryam lw sm7ti bts7ben 3ly 3shan Fawaz?!
Maryam: Nora walla Fawaz jay elriya9' bes youmen w byro7 enty 3ndy 6ol elwagt.
Nora: I still don't trust him.
Maryam: it's been 5 years, yalla 3ad elwld walla 7lel w y7bny! B3den tra mo awl mrra a6l3 m3h!
Nora: 3arfa bes hlmrra e7sasi ygol m7a t3di 3la 5er!
Maryam: e7sask ha4a ma ysht3'l ela lma ykon Fawaz blsalfa!
Nora: l2ni mo mrta7tla, mn elbdaya.
Maryam: Nora shofy ana mo nfs elbzr eli 5awtah when she was 17! I'm 22 now, and I think I'm old enough to know el9a7 mn el3'l6 w kman la tnsen eno al7in t5rjt mn eljam3h w 9arlh hwa ysht3'l snten fa w9'3na al7in bltmam, b3den wha gal jay ygoli 5br 7lo, akeed by56bni!
Nora: yarab yarab tkonen enti el9a7 w ana el3'l6.
I went out with him that day, and that's when everything went from great to terrible.
~
Maryam: Fawaz, la! Tkfa!
Fawaz: 6yb leh ya Maryam? Ana a7bk w b56bk 3adi.
Maryam: hw la aked mob 3adi!
Fawaz: lesh 6yb?!
Maryam: L2na 7ram!
Fawaz: bes e7na n7b b39' w bntzwj mar7 tfrg! W a9ln mo 3la kefk.
~
Letni mt gbl a6l3 m3ah 4ak elyom.
Letni mswya 7adith gbl aw9l bet'h!
Letni w esh yfed al7in letni w ana ent'hk 3r9'i w shrfi w engl3 w trkni.
Ana el7mara eli ma knt asm3 klam Nora!
I walked into the empty huge mansion I call home, and screamed the loudest I could. I wanted to let out my anger. No amount of screaming could help. As if sensing how much I needed her, my phone rang.
'Nora'
My perfect little friend, she doesn't need my problems, or my messed up life! I always drag her into those stupid issues, and she always sticks around to help. This time I decided that I won't tell her about anything.
I went up to my bedroom and slept for the longest time I could after I showered and practically scrubbed my skin off. I woke up sore, heartbroken and most of all scared. What the hell did I get myself into?! I wasn't supposed to end up like this. I did end up like this and this is my fault.
I cried relentlessly for days, and the maid who has been my nanny for 20 years, also she was always like a mother. Came into my room, to snap me out of the dark hole I buried myself into. She even threatened to call my mom and she knew how much I didn't want that.
Christina: ya habibti ya Maryam, why you cry? Tell me, what happen that boy he break up with you?
I nodded, and burst into more tears while hugging her.
Christina: why you cry over him? He is not good. He left you, and you're the most beautiful girl.
Maryam: I'm not crying over him, I'm into so much trouble Christina. If mama and baba find out they will kill me.
Christina: why what did you do?!
Maryam: Christina, he ra-hiccup-ped me.
I heard a gasp and a liquid spill from someone at the door. I looked up, and it was Nora.
Nora: HE DID WHAT! THIS IS WHY YOU HAVEN'T BEEN ANSWERING MY CALLS?!
Maryam: Nora please la t39ben!
Nora: ela b39b! Leh ma tgolenly!
Maryam: l2n elsalfa tfshl! Ana knt 3'bya! I didn't listen to you and you warned me continuously and I ignored you. I thought he loved me.
I went back to crying, now harder than ever. Christina put her hands over her head, and started mumbling some curses in Filipino. I've been around her long enough to understand some of her language.
Nora: ya weli! Sweti t7lel?
Maryam: t7lel wsho?
Nora: t7lel ha4a shsma 7g ele3'te9ab!
Maryam: la 6b3n!
Nora: wsho eli la2 6b3n mjnona enti mfro9' r7ti w bl3'ti w sweti t7lel!
Maryam: aha, aro7 abl3' w ana eli ray7tla bnafsi? B3den men a9ln by9dgni?!
Nora: ana a9dgk! Yarabeh al7in it's too late.
Maryam: oh my god!! OHMYGOD! Sh*t sh*t sh*t!
Nora: wsho??
Maryam: Nora lw knt 7amil??
Nora fainted, and Christina slapped her hands on her face.
Christina: ya allah enti ya mjnona al7in i7na esh nsawy?
I lost all connection with the reality I'm living and stared literally at nothing.
Back to Reality.
I wiped the tears off my damp cheeks, it became a routine for me to cry almost everyday since I found out that I'm actually pregnant. I hated the fact that that my recklessness brought this human being into the world. This baby doesn't deserve me, and I certainly don't deserve being put in this situation. Well I kind of do.
My phone rung, and I jumped awake. It was my mother calling, really mama at 3 AM?
Maryam: alo?
Mother: hala, 7bbty shlonk sh5bark?
Maryam: kwysa el7mdellah.
Mother: Maryam mama shftlk 4ek elbracelet fe Van Cleef allah bes tjnen! Tbenha mama?
Maryam: eli wdk mama!
Mother: 5la9 bjeblk eyaha.
I exhaled, a bit too loudly. I didn't need another bracelet that costs more than my university education, I needed a mother but she didn't understand that concept. At least when it came to me she didn't. I needed her home after I got raped, I needed her lap to rest my head on and cry on. My mother is a kind woman I know that, but I also know that her priorities aren't exactly me and my life.
Mother: ee w Maryam mama tben shan6at chanel wla Hermes? T3rfen 3ad ana fe Paris fa 8rart bshtri only french brands.
And she laughed, I laughed too. I felt a strange feeling of security when she called. After I heard her voice, I felt a comfort that I only get when I talk to her. She may have not been much of a mother for the past 22 years, but she is still my mother.
Maryam: eli wdk mama, w lw ykonon elthnen a7la w a7la!
Mother: aked w ana 3ndi a3'la mn Maryam!
I smiled, my mother did love me.
Maryam: mama, meta jayya?
Mother: walla knt bji bokra bes damk msafra m3 elbnat shkli bmded sfrti thlath asabee3.
I laughed internally, like it mattered if I was home or not. I appreciated the effort though.
Maryam: 5la9 ajl, ashofk b3d thlath asabe3!
Mother: Maryam leeh ma tjen 3ndi?
Maryam: hah? la mama ana msh3'ola m3 tgdem 3la w9'ayf w ki4a.
Mother: eeh.
I hung up after our routine 'i love you' s.
I woke up the next day with huge black bags under my eyes. I put on sweatpants and a shirt that said 'I woke up like this', hah how suiting. I slipped on my hermes slippers, my huge sunglasses, and picked my huge tote. I went down, and went straight into the car. Christina followed me into the car with a sandwhich.
Christina: Mimi, please eat something.
Maryam: Christina mabi, b3den wsh hal ree7a el5aysa!
Christina: wsho ree7a kaysa? Enti kaysa!
Maryam: Christina please, mabi akl.
Christina: you have to because you...
She pointed at my stomach with her eyes.
Maryam: a9ln ana ya Christina msafra 3shan ma y9er..
And I also pointed at my stomach with my eyes.
Flashback:
Nora: Maryam lw sm7ti bts7ben 3ly 3shan Fawaz?!
Maryam: Nora walla Fawaz jay elriya9' bes youmen w byro7 enty 3ndy 6ol elwagt.
Nora: I still don't trust him.
Maryam: it's been 5 years, yalla 3ad elwld walla 7lel w y7bny! B3den tra mo awl mrra a6l3 m3h!
Nora: 3arfa bes hlmrra e7sasi ygol m7a t3di 3la 5er!
Maryam: e7sask ha4a ma ysht3'l ela lma ykon Fawaz blsalfa!
Nora: l2ni mo mrta7tla, mn elbdaya.
Maryam: Nora shofy ana mo nfs elbzr eli 5awtah when she was 17! I'm 22 now, and I think I'm old enough to know el9a7 mn el3'l6 w kman la tnsen eno al7in t5rjt mn eljam3h w 9arlh hwa ysht3'l snten fa w9'3na al7in bltmam, b3den wha gal jay ygoli 5br 7lo, akeed by56bni!
Nora: yarab yarab tkonen enti el9a7 w ana el3'l6.
I went out with him that day, and that's when everything went from great to terrible.
~
Maryam: Fawaz, la! Tkfa!
Fawaz: 6yb leh ya Maryam? Ana a7bk w b56bk 3adi.
Maryam: hw la aked mob 3adi!
Fawaz: lesh 6yb?!
Maryam: L2na 7ram!
Fawaz: bes e7na n7b b39' w bntzwj mar7 tfrg! W a9ln mo 3la kefk.
~
Letni mt gbl a6l3 m3ah 4ak elyom.
Letni mswya 7adith gbl aw9l bet'h!
Letni w esh yfed al7in letni w ana ent'hk 3r9'i w shrfi w engl3 w trkni.
Ana el7mara eli ma knt asm3 klam Nora!
I walked into the empty huge mansion I call home, and screamed the loudest I could. I wanted to let out my anger. No amount of screaming could help. As if sensing how much I needed her, my phone rang.
'Nora'
My perfect little friend, she doesn't need my problems, or my messed up life! I always drag her into those stupid issues, and she always sticks around to help. This time I decided that I won't tell her about anything.
I went up to my bedroom and slept for the longest time I could after I showered and practically scrubbed my skin off. I woke up sore, heartbroken and most of all scared. What the hell did I get myself into?! I wasn't supposed to end up like this. I did end up like this and this is my fault.
I cried relentlessly for days, and the maid who has been my nanny for 20 years, also she was always like a mother. Came into my room, to snap me out of the dark hole I buried myself into. She even threatened to call my mom and she knew how much I didn't want that.
Christina: ya habibti ya Maryam, why you cry? Tell me, what happen that boy he break up with you?
I nodded, and burst into more tears while hugging her.
Christina: why you cry over him? He is not good. He left you, and you're the most beautiful girl.
Maryam: I'm not crying over him, I'm into so much trouble Christina. If mama and baba find out they will kill me.
Christina: why what did you do?!
Maryam: Christina, he ra-hiccup-ped me.
I heard a gasp and a liquid spill from someone at the door. I looked up, and it was Nora.
Nora: HE DID WHAT! THIS IS WHY YOU HAVEN'T BEEN ANSWERING MY CALLS?!
Maryam: Nora please la t39ben!
Nora: ela b39b! Leh ma tgolenly!
Maryam: l2n elsalfa tfshl! Ana knt 3'bya! I didn't listen to you and you warned me continuously and I ignored you. I thought he loved me.
I went back to crying, now harder than ever. Christina put her hands over her head, and started mumbling some curses in Filipino. I've been around her long enough to understand some of her language.
Nora: ya weli! Sweti t7lel?
Maryam: t7lel wsho?
Nora: t7lel ha4a shsma 7g ele3'te9ab!
Maryam: la 6b3n!
Nora: wsho eli la2 6b3n mjnona enti mfro9' r7ti w bl3'ti w sweti t7lel!
Maryam: aha, aro7 abl3' w ana eli ray7tla bnafsi? B3den men a9ln by9dgni?!
Nora: ana a9dgk! Yarabeh al7in it's too late.
Maryam: oh my god!! OHMYGOD! Sh*t sh*t sh*t!
Nora: wsho??
Maryam: Nora lw knt 7amil??
Nora fainted, and Christina slapped her hands on her face.
Christina: ya allah enti ya mjnona al7in i7na esh nsawy?
I lost all connection with the reality I'm living and stared literally at nothing.
Back to Reality.
I wiped the tears off my damp cheeks, it became a routine for me to cry almost everyday since I found out that I'm actually pregnant. I hated the fact that that my recklessness brought this human being into the world. This baby doesn't deserve me, and I certainly don't deserve being put in this situation. Well I kind of do.
My phone rung, and I jumped awake. It was my mother calling, really mama at 3 AM?
Maryam: alo?
Mother: hala, 7bbty shlonk sh5bark?
Maryam: kwysa el7mdellah.
Mother: Maryam mama shftlk 4ek elbracelet fe Van Cleef allah bes tjnen! Tbenha mama?
Maryam: eli wdk mama!
Mother: 5la9 bjeblk eyaha.
I exhaled, a bit too loudly. I didn't need another bracelet that costs more than my university education, I needed a mother but she didn't understand that concept. At least when it came to me she didn't. I needed her home after I got raped, I needed her lap to rest my head on and cry on. My mother is a kind woman I know that, but I also know that her priorities aren't exactly me and my life.
Mother: ee w Maryam mama tben shan6at chanel wla Hermes? T3rfen 3ad ana fe Paris fa 8rart bshtri only french brands.
And she laughed, I laughed too. I felt a strange feeling of security when she called. After I heard her voice, I felt a comfort that I only get when I talk to her. She may have not been much of a mother for the past 22 years, but she is still my mother.
Maryam: eli wdk mama, w lw ykonon elthnen a7la w a7la!
Mother: aked w ana 3ndi a3'la mn Maryam!
I smiled, my mother did love me.
Maryam: mama, meta jayya?
Mother: walla knt bji bokra bes damk msafra m3 elbnat shkli bmded sfrti thlath asabee3.
I laughed internally, like it mattered if I was home or not. I appreciated the effort though.
Maryam: 5la9 ajl, ashofk b3d thlath asabe3!
Mother: Maryam leeh ma tjen 3ndi?
Maryam: hah? la mama ana msh3'ola m3 tgdem 3la w9'ayf w ki4a.
Mother: eeh.
I hung up after our routine 'i love you' s.
I woke up the next day with huge black bags under my eyes. I put on sweatpants and a shirt that said 'I woke up like this', hah how suiting. I slipped on my hermes slippers, my huge sunglasses, and picked my huge tote. I went down, and went straight into the car. Christina followed me into the car with a sandwhich.
Christina: Mimi, please eat something.
Maryam: Christina mabi, b3den wsh hal ree7a el5aysa!
Christina: wsho ree7a kaysa? Enti kaysa!
Maryam: Christina please, mabi akl.
Christina: you have to because you...
She pointed at my stomach with her eyes.
Maryam: a9ln ana ya Christina msafra 3shan ma y9er..
And I also pointed at my stomach with my eyes.
Christina: enti mjnona walla rbi y76k nar!
Maryam: hw wsho rbi y76ni nar!
Christina: ento muslim ygol ha4a mwt baby 7ram!
Maryam: ha4a mo baby, ha4a mo9eba!
Christina shook her head.
Christina: enti mo9eba, yalla Nora eji.
I smiled at her.
Maryam: hw wsho rbi y76ni nar!
Christina: ento muslim ygol ha4a mwt baby 7ram!
Maryam: ha4a mo baby, ha4a mo9eba!
Christina shook her head.
Christina: enti mo9eba, yalla Nora eji.
I smiled at her.
Nora went into the car and slammed the door shut.
Maryam: allah allah, shfeh el7lo m39b?
Nora: wld 3mti dg 3la oboy, galh ab56b Nora!! W oboy gal ha4e elsa3a elmbaraka!
Maryam: m39ba leeh??
Nora: allah ysalmk, ha4a wld 3mti ma54 mglb bnfsa, w shen, w snona 9afra, w sh3ra 6wel mzyt, 9ra7a tgrft w ana a7akek. Hw yalla mo3taz wsh feek ro7 ma6ar!!!
Motaz: enshallah, 3amity Nora.
I laughed silently at Nora's nagging. She hated her dad's side, and no one should blame her. They always hated her mother, and tried to turn her dad against them.
Maryam: agoul erf9'eh!
Nora: la walla? 3la asas oboy byrf9' wld e5ta!
Maryam: akeed y3ny enti ma tbena mo lazm!
Nora: oboy ma 9dg ena wld e5ta el3zeza el7beba eli g3dt 9'da 6ol 3omraha 3shan zwaja mn omi, tbeni ana Nora elwldha.
Maryam: walla ya bnt el7lal klshy bldenya yhon.
Nora: ya allah! Asfa! Shofeny at7l6m 3la moshklti w hya ya 93'rha 3ndk!
Maryam: la please nset 3n nfsi w mo9eebti elftra!!
Nora: ya bnt el7lal ana m6mna mn eli bnsweh, trah 7ram...
Maryam: Nora ana mar7 ajeb hlno9eba 3la eldnya w a5leha tt34b!
I whispered the last part so Moataz wouldn't hear.
Maryam: agol Mo3taz, swa Sami check in llshn6?
Mo3taz: ewa ya 3ammah.
I nodded absent-mindedly.
~
I sipped my latté while staring at the sea in front of me, trying to tune out the world.
Nora: alo?? E5tii 9a7ya entii? W9lti 7lm rgm sb3-63sh shklk!
Maryam: hah? 7lm rgm 20 w enti el9dga a7sn 10 mrat mn elwa83 elzbala 7agi.
Nora: goli el7amdellah ya bnt el7lal, ha4a 89'a2 w 8adar!
Maryam: allouhma la e3tera9'... Ahh.. Elmohem bokra mow3di, btjen m3i?
Nora: la abad jarrah nfsi elm9r 3shan ana9'r elmana9'er el5laba, wsh rayk y3ny??
Maryam: asfa asfa so2al 3'bi 3rfah.
Nora: elmohem, gomi gomi 5n nro7 nmshi 3la elb7r..
Maryam: ok! Yarabi mshtahya sandwhich jobna m3 mraba!
Nora: bdena 7rkat elw7m??
Maryam: 7amel w y7gli!
And for a moment there, everything felt normal even though nothing about me was normal.
~
I was tapping my foot slightly while sitting on the clinic's waiting chair. I had black sunglasses covering half of my face, so no one would recognize me. Nora was walking back and forth relentlessly, driving almost everyone in the clinic insane.
?: m3lesh e5ti momkin twgfen t'hzrn jals'h twtreni w ana jay hena bdon monasaba.
My heart was stuck in my throat thumping loudly, sh*t s3oudy!
Maryam: ok..
It was a safe answer so he wouldn't know where I'm from. After waiting for a couple of hours, I was way too tired and angry. I went up to the receptionist, and asked her why my appointment was delayed.
Nurse: m3lesh ya madame howa a9ln e7na ma 3ndna ela 3'orfa wa7da w eldiktoor eltani mt6w3 fa bydrs el7ala blawl..
Doctor: erm Nawal!
Nurse: ewa ya basha?
Doctor: km mrra agolk ana ma amsk 7alat elejha9'?!
She smacked her palm over her mouth.
Maryam: m3lesh bes ana mst3jla!
In my hurry to do this, I didn't realize that the doctor is actually Saudi.
Doctor: m3lesh e5ti bes momkin td5len el3yada w ntklm shwy?
I was shaking, and scared shitless to put it mildly.
~
In the Doctor's office I was shaking to a degree, that it looks as if I'm put on vibrate.
Doctor: m3lesh e5ti momkin ttrkena l7alna?
Nora gave me a nervous look. I nodded, even though I was nervous I felt safe. I know that this sounds crazy, but it's oddly the truth.
Maryam: shof doctor, lw sm7t 6lbtk la trdni, ent shklk ensan mo7tram w glbk aby9', 6lbtk estr 3ly w la tf9'7ni.
Doctor: akeed, la t5afeen. Bes ana 3ndi 6lb b3d..
Maryam: eli tbeh!
Doctor: la tsg6en eli bb6nk!
Maryam: eli tbeh ela ha4i, doctor tbi ahali y4b7oni?! Ana mo mtzwja ent 3arf esh y3ny ana mo mtzwja y3ny ha4a eli fe b6ni wld 7ram w ra7 y4b7oni ahali gbl la akml 7ta thlath sh'hor lw dro!
Doctor: bes eli btswena 7ram..
Maryam: bes ana kman ma 3ndi 7al thani men elrjal eli ra7 yr9'a bbnt mo3't9ba w 7amil?!
And just like that I burst into tears.
Doctor: ana...
With that being said, I gasped a loud gasp and hiccuped out of shock. What on earth did he just say?!
Maryam: hah?
Docto: esm3eni, ana rjal 3omri 32 sana, I have never thought about marriage, a5i4 ejaza mn dwami blmstashfa Alflani, 3shan aro7 at6w3 bMostaw9fat zy ha4a m7tajen doctors ysht3'lon, w 9ra7a ana ma ar9'a bl7ram bes e7sasi ygouli enk bnt 7lal w eno salftk tfsr kl shay 9ayrlk.. B3den ana ensan mo2men fe en mafe shy 9odfa, y3ny mktob lk tjen ha4i el3yada flyom eli ana mt6w3 feh, w mktob ly ana eni atzwjk w astr 3lek. shofi ya bnt el7lal ana mst3d atzwj w astr 3lek w a5lek trben elwld ha4a bes la tsg6ena, la trtkben ethm fe ro7 rbi ba3'i enha t9er mwjoda 3la hlkon. Esm3i, fkri bklami w e4a ma e8tan3ti ana mar7 akon mdawm bokra w fe doctor mdawm mkani 3shan ymdek tswen el3mlya. W e4a e8tn3ti ha4a elhotel eli ana saken feh. T3ali elsa3a 2 bkon atn9'rk blLobby, w jebi 9degtk m3k. W e4a ma jeti, tra 3adi mtfahm..
I took the hotel's card from his hand while my mouth was wide open. Is this real? I went out of his office, still shocked from what he told me. Could I do it? My hand subconsciously fell to my stomach. I think I actually could. Nora saw my shocked face, and automatically assumed that he threatened to tell my parents but I quickly explained everything he said, and her face suddenly brightened with happiness!
Nora: Maryam! Ha4a elrjal mrsol lk mn rbi! La trf9'en 6lba!
I was still too shocked for words, was she actually serious?! I'm a used girl, who's pregnant, bl7ram.
Maryam: 9a7ya enti?!
Nora: ee 9a7ya million blmeya enti eli mo 9a7ya! Agolk ha4a mrsol lk mn rbi 3shan ystr 3lek w ymn3k mn el7ram, ya Maryam ha4a howa el9a7!
I rubbed my hands on my face, and massaged my temples.
Maryam: mdre mdre! 5alena nakil w arj3 elhotel w ast5eer w ashof.
And I did, and everything in me was screaming do it, except my heart. I was scared that this offer wasn't out of the goodness of his heart, that he maybe wanted something from me. Then again he could take anything he wanted of me, my family's money, my family's connections, what he's doing is much more than anything money could ever buy. So I have finally come to a decision..
~
Nora: Doctor Mansour!
I laughed it was the 5oth time she was trying to say his name..
Maryam: salamat mama? Wsho l3ba howa?
Nora: la bes fkri feha! Mansour w Maryam! You're names match!
Maryam: they do, almost as if we are meant to be and all that crap.
Nora: it's not crap, you are meant to be.
Maryam: walaaiiin bdena enti b3d!
Nora: gomi gomi, mo howa galna bynt9'rna blLobby?
Maryam: ee!
Nora: ajl yalla mn hena!
~
I exhaled and inhaled a little too many times, today was my wedding day, and we're exactly a month and 2 weeks after the day me and Dr.Mansour met. My mother was shocked when she learned that I wanted to get married, but I'm her only daughter so she was extremely ecstatic. She planned every last detail of the wedding and I couldn't be happier because I couldn't care less what color were the flowers, and what shape was the wedding cake, but it was all what my mother cared about. And that made me happy.
I sat on the Kosha, smiling my bright signature smile. Even though I didn't give my mother a lot of time to plan this wedding but she sure has out done herself. She booked a huge wedding hall, and hired the most famous and expensive wedding planners and yet somehow everything worked out perfectly. After 3 days, we are heading to the United states to live there until I give birth so no one would notice anything.
~
7 months later, I had a beautiful baby girl and we named her 'Malak'. We came back to Saudi without telling anyone, and what everyone on the outside knew was that I delivered a premature baby that died on birth. So, one day after Malak was a month old Mansour took her to the nearest mosque and put her beside the door, in a basket. After the prayer ended, the men went out and a lot of commotion happened.
Man #1: ya rbi ya kareem, el6f bna.
Man #2: ya 7ram, meen by3tni feha ha4i?
Mansour: ana! Tkfon ana! Zojti wldt gbl wgtaha w twft bntna w mtshfgen 3la bnt, 5loni arbeha!
And we did raise her. I got to keep my daughter, and marry a man who loved me and I loved. No one else ever knew.
xo
The point of this story is to never lose hope, no matter how big of a problem you're facing somewhere out there is always a solution.
Maryam: shof doctor, lw sm7t 6lbtk la trdni, ent shklk ensan mo7tram w glbk aby9', 6lbtk estr 3ly w la tf9'7ni.
Doctor: akeed, la t5afeen. Bes ana 3ndi 6lb b3d..
Maryam: eli tbeh!
Doctor: la tsg6en eli bb6nk!
Maryam: eli tbeh ela ha4i, doctor tbi ahali y4b7oni?! Ana mo mtzwja ent 3arf esh y3ny ana mo mtzwja y3ny ha4a eli fe b6ni wld 7ram w ra7 y4b7oni ahali gbl la akml 7ta thlath sh'hor lw dro!
Doctor: bes eli btswena 7ram..
Maryam: bes ana kman ma 3ndi 7al thani men elrjal eli ra7 yr9'a bbnt mo3't9ba w 7amil?!
And just like that I burst into tears.
Doctor: ana...
With that being said, I gasped a loud gasp and hiccuped out of shock. What on earth did he just say?!
Maryam: hah?
Docto: esm3eni, ana rjal 3omri 32 sana, I have never thought about marriage, a5i4 ejaza mn dwami blmstashfa Alflani, 3shan aro7 at6w3 bMostaw9fat zy ha4a m7tajen doctors ysht3'lon, w 9ra7a ana ma ar9'a bl7ram bes e7sasi ygouli enk bnt 7lal w eno salftk tfsr kl shay 9ayrlk.. B3den ana ensan mo2men fe en mafe shy 9odfa, y3ny mktob lk tjen ha4i el3yada flyom eli ana mt6w3 feh, w mktob ly ana eni atzwjk w astr 3lek. shofi ya bnt el7lal ana mst3d atzwj w astr 3lek w a5lek trben elwld ha4a bes la tsg6ena, la trtkben ethm fe ro7 rbi ba3'i enha t9er mwjoda 3la hlkon. Esm3i, fkri bklami w e4a ma e8tan3ti ana mar7 akon mdawm bokra w fe doctor mdawm mkani 3shan ymdek tswen el3mlya. W e4a e8tn3ti ha4a elhotel eli ana saken feh. T3ali elsa3a 2 bkon atn9'rk blLobby, w jebi 9degtk m3k. W e4a ma jeti, tra 3adi mtfahm..
I took the hotel's card from his hand while my mouth was wide open. Is this real? I went out of his office, still shocked from what he told me. Could I do it? My hand subconsciously fell to my stomach. I think I actually could. Nora saw my shocked face, and automatically assumed that he threatened to tell my parents but I quickly explained everything he said, and her face suddenly brightened with happiness!
Nora: Maryam! Ha4a elrjal mrsol lk mn rbi! La trf9'en 6lba!
I was still too shocked for words, was she actually serious?! I'm a used girl, who's pregnant, bl7ram.
Maryam: 9a7ya enti?!
Nora: ee 9a7ya million blmeya enti eli mo 9a7ya! Agolk ha4a mrsol lk mn rbi 3shan ystr 3lek w ymn3k mn el7ram, ya Maryam ha4a howa el9a7!
I rubbed my hands on my face, and massaged my temples.
Maryam: mdre mdre! 5alena nakil w arj3 elhotel w ast5eer w ashof.
And I did, and everything in me was screaming do it, except my heart. I was scared that this offer wasn't out of the goodness of his heart, that he maybe wanted something from me. Then again he could take anything he wanted of me, my family's money, my family's connections, what he's doing is much more than anything money could ever buy. So I have finally come to a decision..
~
Nora: Doctor Mansour!
I laughed it was the 5oth time she was trying to say his name..
Maryam: salamat mama? Wsho l3ba howa?
Nora: la bes fkri feha! Mansour w Maryam! You're names match!
Maryam: they do, almost as if we are meant to be and all that crap.
Nora: it's not crap, you are meant to be.
Maryam: walaaiiin bdena enti b3d!
Nora: gomi gomi, mo howa galna bynt9'rna blLobby?
Maryam: ee!
Nora: ajl yalla mn hena!
~
I exhaled and inhaled a little too many times, today was my wedding day, and we're exactly a month and 2 weeks after the day me and Dr.Mansour met. My mother was shocked when she learned that I wanted to get married, but I'm her only daughter so she was extremely ecstatic. She planned every last detail of the wedding and I couldn't be happier because I couldn't care less what color were the flowers, and what shape was the wedding cake, but it was all what my mother cared about. And that made me happy.
I sat on the Kosha, smiling my bright signature smile. Even though I didn't give my mother a lot of time to plan this wedding but she sure has out done herself. She booked a huge wedding hall, and hired the most famous and expensive wedding planners and yet somehow everything worked out perfectly. After 3 days, we are heading to the United states to live there until I give birth so no one would notice anything.
~
7 months later, I had a beautiful baby girl and we named her 'Malak'. We came back to Saudi without telling anyone, and what everyone on the outside knew was that I delivered a premature baby that died on birth. So, one day after Malak was a month old Mansour took her to the nearest mosque and put her beside the door, in a basket. After the prayer ended, the men went out and a lot of commotion happened.
Man #1: ya rbi ya kareem, el6f bna.
Man #2: ya 7ram, meen by3tni feha ha4i?
Mansour: ana! Tkfon ana! Zojti wldt gbl wgtaha w twft bntna w mtshfgen 3la bnt, 5loni arbeha!
And we did raise her. I got to keep my daughter, and marry a man who loved me and I loved. No one else ever knew.
xo
The point of this story is to never lose hope, no matter how big of a problem you're facing somewhere out there is always a solution.
( وَلَسَوْفَ يُعْطِيكَ رَبُّكَ فَتَرْضَىٰ )
((فَقُلْتُ اسْتَغْفِرُوا رَبَّكُمْ إِنَّهُ كَانَ غَفَّارًا ))
( فَإِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْراً * إِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْراً )
((وَاصْبِرْ لِحُكْمِ رَبِّكَ فَإِنَّكَ بِأَعْيُنِنَا))
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Fate 2.0: Part2
I missed writing, and this story so so much.
I hope you like it!
-
Previously:
A few more hours later, the doctor went out of the delivery room, and asked Faisal the most painful question anyone could be asked.
"I'm sorry, bes ent m9'6ar t5tar ben zojtik w wldk. L2n ma n8dar nn8i4 elthnen."
All Faisal could think about was, Maha would never forgive me for this choice but I can't pick a baby over her. I can't live knowing that I was the reason she lost her life, we can always have another baby, but when will I ever find someone like Maha?
After long and deep thinking, Faisal made his choice. He was picking his wife, so he nodded absent-mindedly to the doctor and said loudly with finality;
Faisal: zojti, bes e4a fe shy momkin tswonah w ma y7rmni mn wldi wla zojti ra7 akon mamnon lkom 6ol 3omri.
Faisal kept his hopes high, and prayed to god nonstop. He hoped with all his heart and soul that he won't have to lose any of the people who he considers the centre of his universe. He turned to Anoud&Maha's mother.
Faisal: 5alti? 3noud? E4a entom thnenatkom hena, Reemi 3nd meen?
Anoud: don't worry, I called Turki to pick her up from school w he's dropping her off at your mom's.
Faisal: oh shokran, mfro9' s2lt mn awl bes bali kan msh3'ol.
Noura(Maha's mom): 3la 6ari, ma kan 3ndkom mw3d enty w Turki elyom?
Anoud blushed at that question and made a gesture with her head as if to point out that Faisal was still there, but there was no need since Faisal basically knew everything.
Flashback:
Faisal and Maha were laying down on the couch, with Reem playing with her dolls on the carpet. Faisal was absent-mindedly rubbing Maha's bump while he was extremely focused on the show he was watching.
Maha: t9dg Faisal, mrra ra7ma 3anoud w Turki.
Faisal: leeh tr7menhom 7bebti?
Maha: they've trying to get pregnant for a while now w lsa wla shy.
Faisal: hw 6be3i 7bebti twhom.
Maha: la mo twhom, yarb ena ana 7mlt bReemi on our honeymoon. Hom 9arlhom akthr mn sb3 sh'hor w they've been trying. Believe me, they've been trying a lot w ma nf3 shy.
Faisal laughed loudly at Maha's horrified facial expression.
Faisal: enti esh d5lk b7yatk o5ok mn ha4e elnwa7e?
Maha: mo elmo9eba ena o5oy tzwj my bestfriend ma ynfa3 a5bi 3nha shy.
Faisal: alzm ma 3ly enk ma tgolen l5wati 3n asrarna!
Maha: wsh 3lek a9ln jals'h a36ehom n9ay7.
Faisal: 3la 3noud w Turki mafe ela enhom yshofon doctor..
Maha: shkla ki4aa.
End of flashback.
Faisal paced back and forth for a couple more hours, dreading the news that he was going to hear. The couple of hours turned into 4. It doesn't feel right, why are they taking so long? When he was a few minutes closer to going insane, the doctor came out of the room with the most exhausted expression Faisal has ever seen.
Doctor: abshrk, gdrna nn8e4hom elthnen, m3 4alk zojtik f8dt dam kther fa t7taj trta7 elftra.
Faisal nodded frantically, He needed to see her and his baby.
Faisal: Doctor, momkin ashof Maha awl?
The doctor nodded with a small smile, and lead him to where his wife was resting. His face relaxed into a smile the minute he saw his wife laying peacefully in that bed. His overworking heart relaxed into a steady rhythm. He was brought back to reality when he heard the click of a closing door.
A few hours later, after everyone left to go back home and rest. Maha turned to Faisal, and begged him that they go see their baby. He nodded hesitantly, and reached out for her hand. Maha put on her 3baa, and they started walking slowly to the nursery. The minute they reached the nursery and entered, they asked for their baby.
The nurse lead them to another room, and asked them to wear gloves, shoe covers and some hairnets. They saw a tiny creature in a cubicle surrounded by machines everywhere. Both Maha and Faisal felt as if their hearts were constricting.
Maha: ya glb omik enta, 7bebii..
Maha couldn't stop the tears that were streaming down her cheeks, that baby boy is a part of her. He's a piece of her heart and she prays to god she doesn't lose him. Faisal rubbed her back gently, and squeezed on her arm.
Faisal: he'll be fine, la t5afen.
Maha: esh nsameh?
Faisal: eli tben I'm up for it.
Maha: allah y7f9'k, besmellaah.
Kmlt Maha, td3i for her son.
xo
I hope you like it!
-
Previously:
A few more hours later, the doctor went out of the delivery room, and asked Faisal the most painful question anyone could be asked.
"I'm sorry, bes ent m9'6ar t5tar ben zojtik w wldk. L2n ma n8dar nn8i4 elthnen."
All Faisal could think about was, Maha would never forgive me for this choice but I can't pick a baby over her. I can't live knowing that I was the reason she lost her life, we can always have another baby, but when will I ever find someone like Maha?
After long and deep thinking, Faisal made his choice. He was picking his wife, so he nodded absent-mindedly to the doctor and said loudly with finality;
Faisal: zojti, bes e4a fe shy momkin tswonah w ma y7rmni mn wldi wla zojti ra7 akon mamnon lkom 6ol 3omri.
Faisal kept his hopes high, and prayed to god nonstop. He hoped with all his heart and soul that he won't have to lose any of the people who he considers the centre of his universe. He turned to Anoud&Maha's mother.
Faisal: 5alti? 3noud? E4a entom thnenatkom hena, Reemi 3nd meen?
Anoud: don't worry, I called Turki to pick her up from school w he's dropping her off at your mom's.
Faisal: oh shokran, mfro9' s2lt mn awl bes bali kan msh3'ol.
Noura(Maha's mom): 3la 6ari, ma kan 3ndkom mw3d enty w Turki elyom?
Anoud blushed at that question and made a gesture with her head as if to point out that Faisal was still there, but there was no need since Faisal basically knew everything.
Flashback:
Faisal and Maha were laying down on the couch, with Reem playing with her dolls on the carpet. Faisal was absent-mindedly rubbing Maha's bump while he was extremely focused on the show he was watching.
Maha: t9dg Faisal, mrra ra7ma 3anoud w Turki.
Faisal: leeh tr7menhom 7bebti?
Maha: they've trying to get pregnant for a while now w lsa wla shy.
Faisal: hw 6be3i 7bebti twhom.
Maha: la mo twhom, yarb ena ana 7mlt bReemi on our honeymoon. Hom 9arlhom akthr mn sb3 sh'hor w they've been trying. Believe me, they've been trying a lot w ma nf3 shy.
Faisal laughed loudly at Maha's horrified facial expression.
Faisal: enti esh d5lk b7yatk o5ok mn ha4e elnwa7e?
Maha: mo elmo9eba ena o5oy tzwj my bestfriend ma ynfa3 a5bi 3nha shy.
Faisal: alzm ma 3ly enk ma tgolen l5wati 3n asrarna!
Maha: wsh 3lek a9ln jals'h a36ehom n9ay7.
Faisal: 3la 3noud w Turki mafe ela enhom yshofon doctor..
Maha: shkla ki4aa.
End of flashback.
Faisal paced back and forth for a couple more hours, dreading the news that he was going to hear. The couple of hours turned into 4. It doesn't feel right, why are they taking so long? When he was a few minutes closer to going insane, the doctor came out of the room with the most exhausted expression Faisal has ever seen.
Doctor: abshrk, gdrna nn8e4hom elthnen, m3 4alk zojtik f8dt dam kther fa t7taj trta7 elftra.
Faisal nodded frantically, He needed to see her and his baby.
Faisal: Doctor, momkin ashof Maha awl?
The doctor nodded with a small smile, and lead him to where his wife was resting. His face relaxed into a smile the minute he saw his wife laying peacefully in that bed. His overworking heart relaxed into a steady rhythm. He was brought back to reality when he heard the click of a closing door.
He went and sat next to her and held her hand. He prayed to god, that he keeps her alive; not only for him but for their kids too.
Maha: hmmm, Faisal?
Faisal: 3yoni?
Maha: shfta?
Faisal: lsa, knt ant9'rk..
Maha: abeh Faisal, abe ashofa!
She put her hand on her now nearly flat stomach, and winced in pain.
Faisal: lma y5f elalm nro7la bl3naya.
Maha: leeh 7a6ena bl3naya? Reemi enwldt w heya a93'ar w ma 76oha bl3naya!
Faisal: yeah, bes nab9'ah 9'3eef shwy.. La t5afen, bykon a7sn enshallah! Klshay bykon a7sn.
Without being able to stop himself, a few tears escaped from Faisal's eyes and they dropped on Maha's hand.
Maha: hw Faisal shfeek?
Faisal: no more babies, mn 3'er shar.
Maha: I'm fine.
Faisal: you weren't fine, 5loni a5tar Maha! T3rfen wah m3nat 5loni a5tar? Mab3'a amir bHa4a elsh3or mrra thanya fe 7yati.
Maha: 5laa9 e7na al7in kwysen, la t5af.
A few hours later, after everyone left to go back home and rest. Maha turned to Faisal, and begged him that they go see their baby. He nodded hesitantly, and reached out for her hand. Maha put on her 3baa, and they started walking slowly to the nursery. The minute they reached the nursery and entered, they asked for their baby.
The nurse lead them to another room, and asked them to wear gloves, shoe covers and some hairnets. They saw a tiny creature in a cubicle surrounded by machines everywhere. Both Maha and Faisal felt as if their hearts were constricting.
Maha: ya glb omik enta, 7bebii..
Maha couldn't stop the tears that were streaming down her cheeks, that baby boy is a part of her. He's a piece of her heart and she prays to god she doesn't lose him. Faisal rubbed her back gently, and squeezed on her arm.
Faisal: he'll be fine, la t5afen.
Maha: esh nsameh?
Faisal: eli tben I'm up for it.
Maha: allah y7f9'k, besmellaah.
Kmlt Maha, td3i for her son.
xo
Saturday, December 27, 2014
Fate 2.0: Part1
This is like a mini-seqeul for Maha&Faisal.
Enjoy!
-
"Reem! You have 2 minutes to come down, or I'm leaving without you!"
My husband shouted from downstairs. I tied her little pigtails quickly, and pushed her gently to go down.
Maha: yallaa! Wla baba byro7 bdonik.
Reem: mommy, why are you not taking me to school?
Maha: mommy is tired 7bebi, I can't go to school with you.
Then her face went into an adorable pout, and she crossed her arms.
Maha: baba bya54ik, ana ajebk b3den, yalla! Smile, baby.
Reem: mama! Can you come take me from school with the baby? I told all my friends that my mom has a baby inside but they don't believe me.
Maha: m3lesh mama, the baby is not ready to come yet. He needs a week or two more.
Reem: he's taking so long!
Maha: it's okay, a few more weeks won't hurt.
She kissed the hand that was holding hers and my baby bump, we went down the stairs. Faisal took her bag from me, and then he leaned in to kiss me, but I turned at the last minute so he only got to kiss my cheek. I was still angry after our fight last night.
Faisal: Maha..
Maha: rou7, btt25r Reem 3n elmdrsa.
Faisal: Mahawi, lw sm7te..
Maha: 5la9 Faisal, mo wgta al7en wla ana ly 5lg.
Reem: bye mommy! Love you.
Faisal: yalla m3 elsalama 7bebti, entbhi 3la nfsk.
I blew a kiss to my daughter, because my 9 month pregnant bump wouldn't allow me to bend down properly, the minute I looked up and saw Faisal staring at me I dropped my smile. Mean? I know I wanted him to feel a bit more guilty before I let it go.
I wasn't as angry as I was pretending to be, but I needed him to feel guilty. He was asking me to stop working and I was never agreeing to that. I started feeling light, yet very painful cramps. Oh crap.
It's okay, it's all okay. I went up stairs to my room and packed my bag slowly, even though I was trying to be so calm the cramps were only minutes apart, and I don't think this is what's supposed to happen.
I took deep and slow breaths to calm myself down and to ease the pain. As I rubbed my stomach in soft circular motions, I speed dialled Anoud. She was the one to most likely not panic, plus she took this week off so she doesn't have work.
Maha: alo, shhhhhh..
I winced in pain while talking, but I tried as much as I can not to show it.
Anoud: MAHA! Esh feek?
Maha: cra-sh*t- mps.
Anoud: cramps? Mo contractions?
Maha: would I be wrong about this?
Anoud: wein Faisal?
Maha: twa mn 10 dgayg 6al3 hwa w- my god this isn't supposed to hurt like this.
Anoud: ana bl6reg, don't move!
Maha: 3noud!
I was about to scream blue murder at her, but thankfully she hung up on me. As more time passed, the cramps only got worse. I'm going to call Faisal, I don't care how mad I'm supposed to be at him I don't think the pain I'm going through is normal.
I punched in his number, and waited for him to answer and as usual I didn't wait for long.
Faisal: babe?
Maha: Fai-aaaahhhh..
Faisal: shfeek?
You could hear the panic in his voice, and I was kind of regretting calling him because well he's driving.
Maha: just, please please please come home.
I paced through the house while taking long deep breaths. The maids were standing on one side watching out carefully for me, and not even 5 full minutes since I hung up on him Faisal came back. Before I could run up to him, my water broke. I looked down in panic, only to see that a little blood got mixed in too. I felt as if my heart was being squeezed by a force I can't push away; I can't lose this baby. I need to have this baby, not only for me but for my husband, and my daughter.
Faisal: MAHA! Yalla goumi 7bebti nro7 elmstashfa.
I nodded and walked slowly to the door while one of the maids rushed to get me my 3baya. I took deep fast breaths, and started rubbing my stomach in circles. In one way, I was trying to do it to calm myself down but in another I was trying to make sure that my baby is still there. It was an extremely painful car ride, but Faisal had the radio 3la el8uraan and he held my hand all the while. He rushed me into the emergency section in a wheelchair, and started shouting for the nearest nurse to come and help.
Nurse: yes, sir? What is the problem?
Faisal: my wife is having a baby.
Nurse: it's ok, sir. It usually takes a while before the baby comes out.
Faisal: you're not understanding me, my wife is having a baby and she's bleeding! She's not having contractions she's having cramps. I want a doctor to come see her, now!
Nurse: ok, sir. I will call the doctor now, you come with me to the delivery room.
I swear I could feel Faisal's forced smile, and I could only imagine how intimidating he looked. Especially with his height and built.
Faisal: thank you.
Three hours later I was laying on a bed soaked in blood; even after they gave 2 blood bags I was still losing more blood than I should. I was hanging on the last thread of patience that I had, and I was latched on my husband's hand.
Doctor: Mr.Alx your wife's situation is getting more dangerous, we have to get her into surgery right now, because the baby's heartbeat is becoming weaker.
Faisal looked at me for reassurance on what to do, and I nodded weakly. I was becoming extremely tired, and it wasn't because of the pain but because of the blood loss. I want that baby more than anything, and I'm willing to do whatever has to be done in order to keep it. Faisal kissed my forehead and hand, and read shwayat 8uraan.
~
They took Maha into surgery and left Faisal with his stressful thoughts, but not for long because he was joined by Anoud and Maha's mother. He couldn't stop pacing, his heart was in that surgery room with the love of his life who he might lose any second now. He ran his hand through his hair for what might be the millionth time, and those dark thoughts started pushing into his overthinking mind.
You're the reason she's in there now.
You wanted another baby.
You'll lose your wife because of your selfish decisions.
You're the one behind all this pain.
A few more hours later, the doctor went out of the delivery room, and asked Faisal the most painful question anyone could be asked.
"I'm sorry, bes ent m9'6ar t5tar ben zojtik w wldk. L2n ma n8dar nn8i4 elthnen."
xo
Enjoy!
-
"Reem! You have 2 minutes to come down, or I'm leaving without you!"
My husband shouted from downstairs. I tied her little pigtails quickly, and pushed her gently to go down.
Maha: yallaa! Wla baba byro7 bdonik.
Reem: mommy, why are you not taking me to school?
Maha: mommy is tired 7bebi, I can't go to school with you.
Then her face went into an adorable pout, and she crossed her arms.
Maha: baba bya54ik, ana ajebk b3den, yalla! Smile, baby.
Reem: mama! Can you come take me from school with the baby? I told all my friends that my mom has a baby inside but they don't believe me.
Maha: m3lesh mama, the baby is not ready to come yet. He needs a week or two more.
Reem: he's taking so long!
Maha: it's okay, a few more weeks won't hurt.
She kissed the hand that was holding hers and my baby bump, we went down the stairs. Faisal took her bag from me, and then he leaned in to kiss me, but I turned at the last minute so he only got to kiss my cheek. I was still angry after our fight last night.
Faisal: Maha..
Maha: rou7, btt25r Reem 3n elmdrsa.
Faisal: Mahawi, lw sm7te..
Maha: 5la9 Faisal, mo wgta al7en wla ana ly 5lg.
Reem: bye mommy! Love you.
Faisal: yalla m3 elsalama 7bebti, entbhi 3la nfsk.
I blew a kiss to my daughter, because my 9 month pregnant bump wouldn't allow me to bend down properly, the minute I looked up and saw Faisal staring at me I dropped my smile. Mean? I know I wanted him to feel a bit more guilty before I let it go.
I wasn't as angry as I was pretending to be, but I needed him to feel guilty. He was asking me to stop working and I was never agreeing to that. I started feeling light, yet very painful cramps. Oh crap.
It's okay, it's all okay. I went up stairs to my room and packed my bag slowly, even though I was trying to be so calm the cramps were only minutes apart, and I don't think this is what's supposed to happen.
I took deep and slow breaths to calm myself down and to ease the pain. As I rubbed my stomach in soft circular motions, I speed dialled Anoud. She was the one to most likely not panic, plus she took this week off so she doesn't have work.
Maha: alo, shhhhhh..
I winced in pain while talking, but I tried as much as I can not to show it.
Anoud: MAHA! Esh feek?
Maha: cra-sh*t- mps.
Anoud: cramps? Mo contractions?
Maha: would I be wrong about this?
Anoud: wein Faisal?
Maha: twa mn 10 dgayg 6al3 hwa w- my god this isn't supposed to hurt like this.
Anoud: ana bl6reg, don't move!
Maha: 3noud!
I was about to scream blue murder at her, but thankfully she hung up on me. As more time passed, the cramps only got worse. I'm going to call Faisal, I don't care how mad I'm supposed to be at him I don't think the pain I'm going through is normal.
I punched in his number, and waited for him to answer and as usual I didn't wait for long.
Faisal: babe?
Maha: Fai-aaaahhhh..
Faisal: shfeek?
You could hear the panic in his voice, and I was kind of regretting calling him because well he's driving.
Maha: just, please please please come home.
I paced through the house while taking long deep breaths. The maids were standing on one side watching out carefully for me, and not even 5 full minutes since I hung up on him Faisal came back. Before I could run up to him, my water broke. I looked down in panic, only to see that a little blood got mixed in too. I felt as if my heart was being squeezed by a force I can't push away; I can't lose this baby. I need to have this baby, not only for me but for my husband, and my daughter.
Faisal: MAHA! Yalla goumi 7bebti nro7 elmstashfa.
I nodded and walked slowly to the door while one of the maids rushed to get me my 3baya. I took deep fast breaths, and started rubbing my stomach in circles. In one way, I was trying to do it to calm myself down but in another I was trying to make sure that my baby is still there. It was an extremely painful car ride, but Faisal had the radio 3la el8uraan and he held my hand all the while. He rushed me into the emergency section in a wheelchair, and started shouting for the nearest nurse to come and help.
Nurse: yes, sir? What is the problem?
Faisal: my wife is having a baby.
Nurse: it's ok, sir. It usually takes a while before the baby comes out.
Faisal: you're not understanding me, my wife is having a baby and she's bleeding! She's not having contractions she's having cramps. I want a doctor to come see her, now!
Nurse: ok, sir. I will call the doctor now, you come with me to the delivery room.
I swear I could feel Faisal's forced smile, and I could only imagine how intimidating he looked. Especially with his height and built.
Faisal: thank you.
Three hours later I was laying on a bed soaked in blood; even after they gave 2 blood bags I was still losing more blood than I should. I was hanging on the last thread of patience that I had, and I was latched on my husband's hand.
Doctor: Mr.Alx your wife's situation is getting more dangerous, we have to get her into surgery right now, because the baby's heartbeat is becoming weaker.
Faisal looked at me for reassurance on what to do, and I nodded weakly. I was becoming extremely tired, and it wasn't because of the pain but because of the blood loss. I want that baby more than anything, and I'm willing to do whatever has to be done in order to keep it. Faisal kissed my forehead and hand, and read shwayat 8uraan.
~
They took Maha into surgery and left Faisal with his stressful thoughts, but not for long because he was joined by Anoud and Maha's mother. He couldn't stop pacing, his heart was in that surgery room with the love of his life who he might lose any second now. He ran his hand through his hair for what might be the millionth time, and those dark thoughts started pushing into his overthinking mind.
You're the reason she's in there now.
You wanted another baby.
You'll lose your wife because of your selfish decisions.
You're the one behind all this pain.
A few more hours later, the doctor went out of the delivery room, and asked Faisal the most painful question anyone could be asked.
"I'm sorry, bes ent m9'6ar t5tar ben zojtik w wldk. L2n ma n8dar nn8i4 elthnen."
xo
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